Suicide of Love
by Shadow62
Summary: Kagome...you...cant...dont...leave me...Kagome!" He lifted her figure in his arms, and hugged her tightly. Hoping against fate that she would come back to life, come back to him. How long he held her in his arms he didnt know. But the rain didnt let up an


AN:: ok, hope i get no flammers for this fanfic. Was in a depressed sorta mood when i thought of it. Hope i wrote it alrii. Grammer could use some work, but i really dont care about grammer on this one. Please no flammers..*whimpers* anyways...enjoy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
So many images flashed thro his mind at that moment. images of a time before her, and the time with her. the sleep, and the awakening to see her. so many words left unspoken. so many feeling bottled up inside. but now....it was to late. how did he let it come to this? how could he. He was suppose to protect her! not let her die, not watch...as her life ticked away at the clock. every moment was agony for them both. and the look on her face at this moment would haunt him...forever. He cursed himself. he cursed his frail human form that was unable to protect his friends, unable to protect...Kagome. why did it have to be tonight of all nights! the night of the new moon, when he was reduced to a mere mortal, when he was vulnerable. but...he never thought before...that this was a danger to his friends. it had always been his secret, his torture, his weakness....he didnt know, that it was theirs too. he glances over at the broken shards of the Tetsusaiga. alot of good the sword did. unable to transform, unable to protect when he needed it most.  
  
"thanks father..."  
  
He muttered, causing the dying figure in his arms to stir. His violet eyes set on her, as it seemed she used all her strength just to open her dark eyes to see him. Blood poured from her, so thick that his human nose could pick it up. everything seemed to fade away at that very moment. every thought. all the anger of the past, the tears. they all vanished, when all his mind could focus on...was her.  
  
"Inu...Inuyasha..."  
  
Her angelic voice spoke into the night, shaking and broken. His eyes widened. how did she have enough strength to speak? he placed a single finger upon her lips.  
  
"shhh, Kagome...Dont speak, save your strength, your going to be all right..."  
  
It was dammed the moment he spoke it, and no matter how many times he said it over in his head, the hope that was attached to it diminished. this was it. everything had led up to this moment. the moment of his hearts destruction, a second time. Kagomes hand, shaking, lifted up to softly touch Inuyashas cheek, smearing the slightest of her blood upon his face as her hand was all but drenched.  
  
"Inuy..asha....where're the....others..?"  
  
His eyes widened, realizing now that she didnt know. but she couldn't. for she had been the first..to fall. He lifted his eyes to the four other figures that lye upon the ground. his friends. the monk, Miroku, who will never get his revenge, and save his bloodline, for he was the last of his family,and now...he was gone. Sango, mourned for her brothers loss, looking to free him from the strings that bind him to Naraku, will never again set eyes upon him. Kirara, loyal to her friends and always the one to count on, lost in the darkness as well. and shippou, who looked to Kagome as a mother when his was gone, who annoyed the hell outta Inuyasha, yet protected them both when he could, his little life, lost as well. he couldn't tell Kagome, he couldn't let her know. He didnt want her to die, blaming him for her friends death...did she blame him for her?  
  
"they are gone...aren't they?"  
  
Kagomes small voice reached his ears, causing him to wince a bit. Kagomes eyes swelled in tears, tears that came out...crimson. She was really fading now, she had...she had to tell him...  
  
"Inuya..sha.."  
  
She let her hand linger on his face, as a small smile graced her cold lips. He looked down at her with his eyes, soft and full of pain. She had never seen his eyes like that, he looked so....sad.  
  
"If...if i..had..only...*cough*..told you..sooner.."  
  
His eyes widened a bit as he looked down upon her. her skin was cold to the touch, she was holding on by a string and was quickly fading. So many new emotions he felt, while trapped in his human form. anger...hate...sadness. He paused for a moment, as something stirred within him he didnt recognized, or handout felt...in a long long time.  
  
"Inuyasha....."  
  
Kagome muttered, bringing him back from his mind. Her body contracted in his arms as a wave of pain settled over her.  
  
"Kagome dont speak..."  
  
"I..have to say this...please....let me.."  
  
He simply nodded, as her hand ran over his cheek. So cold was her skin, almost lifeless. No warmth in her fingertips, but still...it was her.  
  
"Inuyasha.....i dont know...if you feel the same....but...i...i...i love....you....Inuyasha..."  
  
His eyes widened at her words, more so that her hand had fallen from his cheek, and her eyes, fading, she smiled, and let go of her last breath. He raised his shaking hand and placed it on her cheek, so cold..so lifeless....she loved him. she loved him. the worthless hanyou, the jerk as she always said. she loved him. dissipate all that, she loved him. and as the words echoed in his mind, he realized....he loved her too. somewhere along the line, she had healed the wounds of his heart..and his soul...and he had fallen in love...not with Kikyou's reincarnation...but with Kagome.  
  
"Kagome...you...cant...dont...leave me...Kagome!"  
  
He lifted her figure in his arms, and hugged her tightly. Hoping against fate that she would come back to life, come back to him. How long he held her in his arms he didnt know. But the rain didnt let up and neither did his pain. Finally, as the stench of death settled on her, wiping out the sweet scent of all that was her, he opened his eyes. Glazed and tearful, he looked at the dead bodies of his friends, of his..life. Thats what they were. Over the time they were there, they had become everything to him. And the person that meant the most to him now...was gone.  
  
Slowly he dug the graves, six graves in the ground. One by one he let them down in it. Covered them up and put flowers on their grave, and he paused, as he came to Kagomes grave, uncovered and empty. Her body lay on the ground next to him, rain pounding in his ears. Could he bury her? could he really go through with it? nodding he slowly picked up Kagomes limp form. he owed her this much. a proper burial, well as proper as it could get. And he wept, for what he thought to be perhaps the first time in his life, he openly wept. He placed a single red rose upon her grave, closing his eyes he muttered a few words, ending with an apology.  
  
"Forgive me Kagome, I could not...save you."  
  
and he glanced at the other grave. the empty grave. the one he had dug...for him. his joints ached from the work. for he was still human. but he stared at that grave with a longing. a longing he had never felt before. to join Kagome. to join her in death. but there was no one here to fulfill this wish of his. and soon it would be sunrise and the emotion he would feel might go away...but did he want it to? he looked down, seeing the shards of the Shikon jewel in his hand. should he still gather them and become a full demon and perhaps this pain would go away, but if that happened, would the memory of Kagome go as well? no...he couldn't allow that. but he couldn't live with the pain he felt now. he looked down at the dagger in his hand. his choice. a moment of dispair had led to this. he dropped into the grave, the rain soaking him fully. and he laid back into the dirt, into the mud. his face smudged, with both tears, rain and dirt. he was still human. he could die and perhaps be at ease, without his demonic blood interfering. and he lifted the knife to his throat, Kagomes words echoed in his mind. 'Inuyasha...I love you...'....  
  
"I'll be with you soon....Kagome..."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
And thats it. Short story, just one chappie. Hope you enjoyed and arent to sad at what i did.  
  
~Shadow~ 


End file.
